After four years of protests, riots and fire bombings, after heated public debate and the a hunger strike by the local vicar which resulted in his death and the direct intervention of the both the Archbishop of Canterbury and the Vatican, to the cheers of protesters, rioters and the clergy alike, Northumberlands first topless bar opened for business in the village of Howick on Friday night. “It’s been a long hard fight” said owner and proprietor Miss Olive Sump “but the support has been overwhelming, it will be a great boost for the local economy”. The bar which has been named Mams was officially opened by Mother Tempestuous, Mother superior of the Craster convent. Over £250 has been spent converting the village hut and over £50 on the interior which was designed by village grave digger Harry Clankers A full itinerary of events is planned at the bar including bingo, a domino handicap, whist drives, barbecues and the formation of a Leek club. After Farther Alfonso Vimto, representing the Vatican filled the bar, the gathering settled down to an informal singsong with Mother Tempestuous on the spoons while Olive and her barmaids, Vera Fluke and Matilda Tupp served pints of foaming ale.