One of the regions most notable public servants is this week moving to Germany, in the hope of taking on new employment. Horace Hobbs has kept the unisex public lavatories at Seaton Point stain free for the past thirty four years, but unfortunately, due to a local Government directive, his "job" is on the line. "There's just no demand for the public convenience" a Council spokes- man told us exclusively. "Mr. Hobbs has fallen victim to his own honesty, and is therefore expendable". Problems arose for Horace when he informed his employers that his workload was becoming much lighter as time went on. The early eighties were the heyday of the convenience. Cleansing would commence ten or twelve times daily, although nowadays, Mr. Hobbs is lucky to sluice out once a week. "I blame the advent of the self cleaning indoor toilet" he told us, looking flushed, and with a tear rolling down his cheek. "Once over, folk would be queuing up to splatter my gleaming porcelain. Today, they all go before leaving the house. Its that simple!". Mr. Hobbs, awarded the M.B.E. in the 1987 New Years Honors List, claims that because of the loss of his council contract, his horse, Pinkie will have to be destroyed, and his cart, affectionately referred to by locals as "The Turdis", due to the amount of excrement it could hold, would be dismantled and sold for scrap. As a memorial to long service, Mr. Hobbs toileteer shovel is destined to be melted down, and made into a railing which will be incorporated into the fence that now keeps the plebs off the recently revitalized Tenantry Column. Career opportunities are few and far between in the field of human waste disposal, but Germany beckons. After hearing of Mr. Hobbs plight, officials from Der Deutcher Sheise Arbeite offered him the chance of a bright future at the Legoland Comp- lex in Cologne. It boasts the worlds largest toilet, being a massive 475 feet in diameter, 340 feet tall and constructed from a staggering 23 million plastic bricks. After the untimely demise of its previous attendant, Dter von Ploppen, the situation has become vacant. "It sounds like a hell of a task" Mr. Hobbs is quoted as saying. "The sheer scale of the Cologne project means that 680 people could conceivably hunker down at one sitting. Now that's bound to put some meat on my scrubbing arm". His only reservation was revealed when he commented... "they eat a lot of spicy sausage over there,.... don't they?" Wolfgang Grindelwald, chief executive of the union hopes that Horace will have the right stuff to fill the late Mr. von Ploppens shoes